He’s still dead

As I prepare for leading a Widows’ Retreat Cruise near the end of the month, I was reviewing my material for it.  Much is about the grief process, some is about coping, but some is even about humorous happenings in very difficult circumstances.

When there is a death of a loved one, emotions are very volatile; one minute we may be weeping and the next, breaking out into hilarious laughter.  Humor does help in the grief process.

Steve and I had driven Mother to the funeral miles away of my cousin’s husband.  He had suffered from a debilitating disease for years.  Every time I had seen my cousin through the years, I always asked about her husband Herb.  She usually answered, “About the same.” A couple of months after his death she drove up my driveway just as I was arriving home.  She had brought her mom to visit with my mom (they were sisters) and just came across to tell me hello.  We hugged and greeted each other. Then out of habit, I asked what I always had –“How’s Herb?”

She was taken aback for a moment knowing I had been to his funeral.  Then she laughed and answered, “Better off than he’s ever been.”

Another story was told me by a pastor friend who worked part-time at the hospital.  His job was to take in-patients to x-ray.  He felt it part of his ministry to comfort and put them to ease. He would engage them in conversation.  One very old little lady sat quietly in the wheel chair. He asked, “Where do you live?”

“Albertville.”

“How many children do you have?”

“Nine.” Through his litany of questions, he could only solicit one-word answers from her.

Thinking she probably just didn’t want to be bothered, he continued pushing her to x-ray silently.  In a short while, she twisted around and told him, “If I don’t hurry and die, my late husband is going to assume that I’ve died and gone to Hell.”

Some widows find love a second time and remarry.  Such was the case with one lady my friend and singer  Cheri Taylor encountered:

Not making fun, yet it’s still funny: I did a Christmas concert last evening for a senior group. One of the ladies introduced me to her new husband. I then asked their names to which the lady said to me as she looked at her man, “Oh shoot! What IS my new last name?!”🤣🤣

One thing we can rejoice in is the fact Jesus always had (and still does) compassion for widows. One example is in Luke 18:

The Parable of the Persistent Widow

1 Then Jesus told his disciples a parable to show them that they should always pray and not give up. 2 He said: “In a certain town there was a judge who neither feared God nor cared what people thought. 3 And there was a widow in that town who kept coming to him with the plea, ‘Grant me justice against my adversary.’

4 “For some time he refused. But finally he said to himself, ‘Even though I don’t fear God or care what people think, 5 yet because this widow keeps bothering me, I will see that she gets justice, so that she won’t eventually come and attack me!’”

6 And the Lord said, “Listen to what the unjust judge says. 7 And will not God bring about justice for his chosen ones, who cry out to him day and night? Will he keep putting them off? 8 I tell you, he will see that they get justice, and quickly. However, when the Son of Man comes, will he find faith on the earth?”

Another scripture that reveals this care and protection is James 1:27: Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress …

Wherever you might be today on your grief journey, the following just might reassure you that you aren’t forgotten.

Today:

-we are traveling at 67,000 miles per hour around the sun.

-over 350000 babies will be born.

-over 153000 people will die.

-numerous events, plans, decisions, and actions will be taken.

-And GOD knows about all of the details and has it all accounted for in His perfect plan.

Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? And not one of them will fall to the ground apart from your Father. But even the hairs of your head are all numbered. Matthew 10:29-30

( copied from Ray Tucker’s FB post)

May God’s blessings be yours in the New Year.

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